A Year already

Last weekend marked a year since I made my life changing decision. Did I focus on it no it did pop into my mind who wouldn't think of the day the decided to separate. It wasn't til I dropped my kids off to their dad that it was crammed down my throat.

What have I done in that year well let's see I have subbed at a few schools in the area, gone through a ton of stuff from my storage unit that is no longer needed or will be used. I have spent a lot of time with my kids and even got to hang out with friends(something I never could do before).

What's new in my life I got a car last summer so now I am able to drive myself and the kids to the places we need to go. I signed up for a dating website that was a totally new experience for me. I just did that for humor had a few weirdos at this point I told myself I'm not trying and if God wants me to have someone he'll send someone my way. Then got a message from a guy asking to be friends and just email each other. Cool someone that only wants to be friends I thought. He lived in Cyprus so I thought yeah why not what are the chances of anything coming from this friendship. Well I thought wrong after emailing each other and chatting with each other over a hundred times and getting to know each other I actually fell for him it took a while though even after he admitted first that he had fallen for me. I still didn't want to admit how I felt afteral it had only been a couple of months. Well it has not be 3 months going into 4 months of getting to know each other and I feel as though I could tell him everything(I don't though not yet) and I feel as though we've known each other for years.

This guy when he describes himself and what he thinks and feels is everything I ever wanted a guy to think like. I always tell him he's like a fairytale guy cause you can't find men like that here. He asks my opinion on things actually wants them can you believe that he wants to help me out and listen to me when I have a problem and see if he can help. He wants to know how I am doing actually is concerned when something happens to me. I am so not used to this it almost feels weird.

We would talk for hours everyday all day it's been a little less this last month cause he's been working two jobs. He said he's doing it to save money for a life trip. When I asked what that was he said it was to come here. He in fact he appointment with the embassy to find out what all he needs to do to come over here. God I hope he can actually do that it's great to have what I call a virtual boyfriend but it would be even better if we could actually go out in person somewhere and hangout together. Right now our dates consist of video chat but hey at least I can say I've seen him and vise versa. LOL So I know the pictures he sends are him for real. He is great and I so very much want to have a chance to see what can come from our friendship.

The hardest part of having to rely on internet is when the internet won't work for you cause then you can't talk or see each other. But that is when we have out texting to fall back on.

There are times where it does suck to have him way over there where he is that is when you've had a bad day and all you need is a hug to make you feel better or when you get hurt and all you want is to spend time in that persons arms. Or in my case when the kids are asking why can't he be here where we are. One day that'll change I'm hoping if it is God's will. I am leaving my love life in God's hands if it is meant to be then it's meant to be but for now I am very happy the happiest I've been in a very long time. Thank you God for bringing this great man into my life and helping me see who I really want to be by having him see who I really am inside.