Good Day Gone Bad

Why is it that I am the only person on my seperation that realizes that being sererated means trying to move on and learn to handle lifes crappy problems yourself. My soon to be ex's grandfather passed away recently and the funeral is tomorrow. With each passing day my ex has gotten worse and worse when it comes to being civil I won't say nice cause that ship sailed last month when his car broke down.

I offered a friendly ear to listen and shoulder to cry on and what did that get me an attempt for a kiss. NO thanks no more take advantage of me once that's a mistake but to allow you to do it again that would be totally my fault and stupid. So I reminded him how I had a previous engagement recently I even told him last month before all this what it was. I can't help that the funeral landed on the same day as the party but it did. I will be attending the service but after that I have to leave for then next thing. But for some reason my ex thinks that I still owe it to him to be there with bells on to help him out even though I can count on how many fingers how often he was NOT there for not like he thinks he was. I have suffered through plenty of mourning of loved ones literally being in the same house as him happily married where I had to work through it alone no help from him. Yet for some reason with us being on the verge of divorce I am told by him that I should be there for him.

I am I will listen and offer my prayers but we are past any part of happy get togethers like we were while living together. I have been accused of being selfish which I know in my heart I am not. I pray every night for him and his family and for what God wants me to do and I get the same answer that he needs to work through this alone.

This sounds really cruel but I can NOT wait til the funeral day passes so that maybe just maybe he will attempt to get back to somewhat civil.

To top it all off his car broke down beyond repair so now he has reached the point of me and that would be Carless. Only rather then willingly use his motorcycle to just come up and see them he is pouting rather than making due with what he can til he gets a new car. I have to rely on others too but I know that if the people willing to drive me can't drive them down then I am good I will adjust. So he needs to learn that if the people around him (his mom)can't help him then he would just need to adjust just like me. It's not like he has no mode of transportation to come by and see them for a few hours he could. He just can't have any overnights.

I honestly can't wait til this divorce is final so that I can say according to paperwork I am a FREE woman being that he feels a seperation apparently means that he can still TRY to control me.